"...And so the Lord used to speak to Moses face to face, just as a man speaks to his friend..." (Exodus 33:11)
I was riding along in my car in worship before the Lord, and He startled me with a loaded question that confronted the religious spirit in me immediately. The question was so simple, yet it carried the power to expose the filthy remnants in me that appear to be good, but are actually contrary to His Spirit and His perfect will. I didn't know I could be convicted by something so kind, but, after all, it is "the goodness of God that leads us to repentance" (Romans 2:4).
The question was this:
"Sierra, will you be my friend?"
This was not a question coming from a place of insecurity. The Lord is the most secure Person in the universe, and He is not desperate for love. Rather, it was the emphasis He placed on the word "friend" that made the message clear, which was that there is a distinct difference between being a servant of God and being a friend of God. Serving, I can do fairly well, but when it comes to friendship, I realized I tend to treat my friends better than I do the Lord. I talk with them more than I do the Lord. I spend more time with my friends than I spend with the Lord, and the truth is that Lord is infinitely more jealous for my friendship than all of these friends combined, no matter how loving and well-meaning they may be.
Mainly for my own sake because of this recent conviction, but hopefully for the benefit of others, I want to unpack what being "a friend of God" entails and what it looks like according to His Word. Unsurprisingly, His Word is chock full of examples, and this topic is arguably one of the most prevalent themes in God's history with mankind. If we miss this, we miss God's heart for us as children, and we miss our destiny.
Abraham: Friend of God
In Genesis, Abraham (then called Abram) arrived on the scene, and at an appointed time, God revealed His marvelous plans and made a covenant with him and all the generations that would descend from his lineage. This man, through his rich history with the God of Israel, would come to be known as "the Friend of God" (James 2:23). What an honorable title! But what was it that made him so special that he would gain the friendship of God Himself? What we realize when we read through his interactions with the Lord is that he wasn't "special" in the way we tend to think of the word. He wasn't the most talented, most good-looking, most wise, or the wealthiest individual by any stretch. Above all else, his humanity was one of the most evident things about him. It says Abraham believed in what God promised, and it was accounted to him for righteousness (Exodus 15:6), however, these promises didn't come without some questions. After all, the claims the Lord made sounded pretty outlandish, so much so that Abraham and his wife couldn't help but laugh in disbelief!
One thing I noticed in Abraham's relationship with God was how honest and un-apologetically himself he was before the Lord, to the point where he even felt comfortable questioning God about His judgement of Sodom and Gomorrah. He did so humbly, but the whole conversation almost looks like a dialogue among close friends. Most religious people wouldn't dare question God this way, but in doing so, they miss the opportunity for a deeper level of intimacy with God. Abraham, on the other hand, seized this moment and walked away with greater understanding of God's justice, and he loved and trusted Him all the more for it.
Abraham looked out at the city and the people God was about to destroy. Then he drew near to the Lord and asked Him "Are you really going to destroy the righteous with the wicked? If there were, say, 50 righteous people in this city, you would just destroy the whole thing? Far be it from You to do such a thing. You're the Judge of the whole earth--shouldn't you judge rightly?" The Lord replied that if that were the case, He wouldn't destroy it. Then Abraham says "Ok, I realize I'm just dust and probably shouldn't be questioning You like this, but hear me out: suppose there were 45 righteous. Would you still destroy it?" Again, the Lord said if that were the case, He would not destroy it. The back and forth continues. Abraham asks "What about..40?" "Nope." "30?" "Nope." "Don't get mad that I keep asking you this, but how about 20?" "Nope." "Ok, last question. What about just 10 righteous people?" "Nope. I still wouldn't destroy it" (Exodus 18:22-33, paraphrased). Before he decided to count down to one, I guess Abraham decided the conversation was becoming a bit redundant and he thoroughly understood the actions of the Righteous Judge.
It should be noted that leading up to this moment, Abraham had a history of radical obedience to the Lord. Wherever the Lord told him to go, he went. Whatever the Lord told him to do, he did, and he did so without hesitating, even when he was put to the test and asked to slay his son--who was both a miracle and a long awaited fulfillment of a promise--on the altar as a sacrifice. He had so much faith in God and what He promised that not even being asked to sacrifice his beloved son would cause him to doubt God's promises. He even did so not knowing why God asked him to do it, or what this event was foreshadowing about what God Himself would do in the future. Jesus said that the mark of a friend of God was obedience to what He commands (John 12:14), but through Abraham's relationship with God, we see that this kind of obedience doesn't come from a master/slave mentally, but rather, obedience becomes the natural outflow of the relationship with the One who is called Faithful and True.
John the Baptist: Jesus's "Best Man"
John the Baptist was actually the cousin of Jesus, but we don't hear of them meeting face to face until Jesus came to be baptized by him in the Jordan. Though he looked no better than a vagabond at best, Jesus regarded Him highly, calling Him "the greatest man born among women" (Matthew 11:11). Even in the womb, John rejoiced at the Messiah's coming (Luke 1:41), and He proclaimed the message the Lord gave him, even unto death.
When John was approached by his startled disciples who were concerned that Jesus was taking the glory away from John's ministry of baptism, he immediately reminded them of whom the glory rightfully belongs and makes an interesting analogy about his relationship with Jesus. He explains, "He who has the bride is the bridegroom; but the friend of the bridegroom, who stands by and listens to him, rejoices greatly because of the bridegroom’s voice. So this pleasure and joy of mine is now complete. He must increase [in prominence], but I must decrease" (John 3:29-30). John acknowledges that he is essentially the "best man" of Jesus the bridegroom. He has labored long and hard and has long awaited the day when his Friend goes and wins the woman of His dreams, which is His glorious church. What right does he have to get in between the Lord and His furious love for His bride? Even in today's terms, what true friend would be upset to see their best friend marry the love of their life?
What John shows us is that a true friend of God is one who not only gives glory and honor to Whom it is rightfully due, but celebrates Him when he sees the Lord doing what He has purposed in His heart to do. John explains that His joy was fulfilled because his Friend's joy was being fulfilled. Like we celebrate our own friends when they follow their dreams, we should celebrate all His works in the past, present, and the future and join Him in His excitement of the day when "the Spirit and the Bride say 'Come!'" (Revelations 22:17).
Can He Trust You?
I had already read the New Testament a couple of times, but this passage really struck me and caused me to examine my own heart. It comes right after Jesus flipped tables, dumped money, and drove everyone out of the temple because a place of fellowship with His Father had been taken advantage of and turned into a mere business venture for the greedy.
The apostle John, who was so close to Jesus He was also called "John the Beloved," made this keen observation about Him: "Now when He was in Jerusalem at the Passover feast, many believed in His name [identifying themselves with Him] after seeing His signs (attesting miracles) which He was doing. But Jesus, for His part, did not entrust Himself to them, because He knew all people [and understood the superficiality and fickleness of human nature], and He did not need anyone to testify concerning man [and human nature], for He Himself knew what was in man [in their hearts—in the very core of their being]. (John 2:23-25).
Jesus was never impressed by the fanfare of adoring onlookers who "loved" Him merely for the miracles He performed in their midst. He was more than happy to do them, of course. Glorifying the Father and destroying the works of the devil were, and still are, His favorite activities, but more than all the miracles, we see His deep desire for authentic, lasting connection with the people He was giving His life for. He has never been in favor of superficial friendships. He knew if the miracles stopped and they were just left with Him alone, everyone who claimed to love and follow Him would disappear. Very few remained who actually wanted to know His heart and loved Him for who He is, regardless of what He did or didn't do, and regardless of what He did or didn't say. These 12 were His true friends, and they would follow Him anywhere. We know that none of them were perfect, but at least they were willing, and these willing ones were the kind of people that He could entrust Himself to. In fact, those who remained, He said He made known to them EVERYTHING He had heard from His Father, and for that, He considered them His friends; not servants (John 15:15). Therefore, friends of God are those who have access to secret things that He doesn't tell just anyone. He tells them these things because they love Him and are loved by Him, and though they didn't understand everything that came out of His mouth, they saw it as an opportunity to get to know Him better instead of being offended.
Not Everyone Who Says "Lord, Lord"
At the end of our lives, we will all stand before God. We'll see Him sitting on His throne. He will look at you with a look that you know has seen the number of your days, and every secret motive, thought, or intention will be laid bare as you come to state your case. Out of desperation, some will just give Him their resume, telling Him everything they ever did for Him--even miraculous things that mimic the ministry of Jesus Himself. They will place an emphasis on the fact that they did this or that work in "His name," however, Jesus will point out that they knew Him in name only, but they did not know Him, and He will even tell them that He "never knew them," before casting them out of His presence forever. Still, there will be others who knew Him, who walked in His will, and loved Him more than life itself. The difference is that they won't try to defend themselves by what they did for Him, but how they had been with Him. These will be well-acquainted with His likes and dislikes, and from that place of friendship will be inspired to His desires fulfilled in their lives and the lives of those around them.
God Desires Real Fellowship
If God merely wanted servants, He would not have created man. For that, He has countless angels at His disposal, and we know that God didn't take on the form of angels so He could redeem them, but took on the form of a Man, whom He had made in His likeness so He could redeem them and bring them into everlasting fellowship with Himself. If He never desired to be with us, He wouldn't have walked with Adam and Eve in the cool of the day. He would have never dwelt in a tabernacle to meet with the priests. He would have never sent His Son. He would have never sent His Spirit. He would have never let John write the words that "God so greatly loved the world that He gave up His only begotten Son, so that whoever believes in Him shall not perish but have everlasting life" (John 3:16).
God has plenty of servants, but will you be His friend?
As you ponder this message, just set your gaze on the Lord and begin to worship Him, which is really easy to do when you're looking at Him!
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